First things first, it is SO true what they say, Motherhood is somewhat of a secret club - it seems to create an instant bond between people who may not have normally said a word to each other. I think this rings even more true for moms of multiples. So welcome to the club within a club. I cannot even begin tell you how many coworkers and facebook friends have sought me out since my pregnancy announcement to share clothes, tips and so much more. I will be forever grateful for these women and am so excited to connect with old and new friends on a different level than before.
If you are anything like me and you weren't expecting to have twins so you will probably have to pick your jaw up off the floor before you can even begin planning. Once you recover from the initial shock that you are growing not one but TWO tiny humans... start perusing the information below and get to work cause those babies will be here before you know it. I say initial shock because even at 22 weeks I still have moments where I still think "Holy crap, there are two little humans in there" you will have so many moments of disbelief, self doubt, fear, overwhelming joy and excitement in the coming weeks but just know that it is so totally normal.
Baby Registry:
My advice: start simple, you are having two babies so make sure your registry starts with the bare necessities and then add as needed from there. By necessities I mean the things you will need to have in the first 3 months of their life. Car seats, stroller, baby carriers (if you plan to wear your children), diapers, wipes, bassinet/cribs etc.
You will get so many clothes from people and your babies will probably only get the chance to wear about 1/3 of those so don't be afraid to return some of them and buy what you really need. While some people will tell you to include a range of gifts in different price ranges - I completely disagree you have enough to worry about - you are making a list of what you and your babies NEED so if someone wants to contribute and cannot find a gift in their price range they can always buy a gift card.
Just remember a registry is a work in process - it will never be "complete" so do not let it be a stressor. I would try to have at least a good idea of what you need prior to your first shower you can always add/take away items later. I also recommend checking different resale shops and websites to stock up on the more expensive items (strollers, car seats, etc.) you need so that you can clear up your registry and make room for different items as you go.
The Listful Mom has a short list of what you need for twins here
Doyle Dispatch has a very specific list of what you need for twins with links to the blogger's registry here and her updated list here that she wrote 2 months post delivery of what she did/did not use.
The wise baby registry guide is really helpful when narrowing down registry items and gives some specific brands that you might want to look into.
The Hellobee guide to "what you need two of, what it's nice to have two of, and what you can skip all together" is extremely helpful when starting your registry and trying to decide what are must haves.
Lucie's List is an amazing resource with reviews of different products and I found it very helpful when trying to narrow down car seats and strollers. It gives practical information without being overwhelming.
Our Baby List registry can be found here - I absolutely LOVE this website and will probably do an entire post about how wonderful it is but for now feel free to check it out yourself. They have a button you can add to your browser that makes it easy to add items from anywhere on the internet and you can merge your store registries with the baby list to make it easy for everyone to find your list in one place.
Once I "finished" my registry I was lucky to have a few close friends and sisters in law that I sent my registry to and they helped me weed out the items I didn't really need. So don't be afraid to ask other moms for advice. Just keep in mind when it comes down to it what works for everyone else may not work for you and your babies so don't be surprised if you end up needing to return/trade in items that other people recommend. When looking at the in store registries pick stores that have great return policies. Buy Buy Baby is amazing for this - plus you can use your 20% coupons from bed bath and beyond and who doesn't love a discount?? I know Babies R' Us will also accept Buy Buy Baby's coupons. If you have a baby store near you it doesn't hurt to go in and get a feel for the products you are eyeing. I loved being able to see the strollers we like in person and getting to push them around the store.
Maternity Clothes:
Don't be afraid to take people up on their offers - especially for maternity clothes - creating a new wardrobe adds up quickly and having twins means you will probably change sizes at least once if not more during your pregnancy so even if it fits at the beginning by the end you will be scraping the barrel for clothes that fit. You will probably need maternity clothes much sooner than your friends who are pregnant with singletons so start stocking up now.
Because you will likely fluctuate sizes as your pregnancy progresses (I started in all XS/S around 14 weeks and at 22 weeks I am slowly moving into the Medium range, I project I'll be wearing Large/XL by the end) so take any size you can borrow and give yourself some options. Obviously you will want to buy a few of your own pieces, because who doesn't love shopping? I recommend looking for used items first and then adding in a few of your own purchases to round out your wardrobe. Most people only wear maternity clothes a handful of times before they are done being pregnant so you can find some almost brand new things at resale shops, discount stores like Ross and Marshalls, and even online through facebook groups or online garage sales.
When you are ready to buy some new items SHOP SALES - I have found some great deals at GAP maternity - in fact I got almost an entire winter wardrobe (3 sweaters, 2 tops, 2 cardigans and 2 pairs of pants) for just under $100 because everything was and extra 40% of clearance. So far I have found the clothing that seems to hold up the best and gives you the most bang for your buck is at GAP, Ann Taylor Loft, Old Navy and Target. A couple of other popular stores/brands are Motherhood Maternity and Pea in the Pod. I have found they are a bit on the pricier side for the quality of clothing offered but they also have some very cute/trendy styles. Motherhood is great for work clothes and I really like their dresses. If you plan to have more pregnancies after this one I would definitely invest in quality clothes that will hold up and that you can resell once you are done having babies to recoup some of the cost.
Networking:
I cannot say enough about networking. This is a great way to connect with other moms who are going through the exact same thing as you. If you are like me and live in a small town it might be harder to find moms close to home, but I would recommend trying to plug into groups that are in the nearby metropolitan areas. I have found some great Austin based facebook that cater to moms and moms of multiples. We live about an hour north of Austin but have family in the Austin area so these groups will be very convenient for me. If you don't live near a large city that is convenient for you try looking into local MOPS groups or searching Meet Up for local groups that cater to moms of multiples. If you are a church goer start asking around for any bible studies or sunday school classes for young families to get plugged in with people in your life stage.
I will admit I was hesitant to joining the facebook groups at first - I was worried they would clog my news feed and be full of unnecessary information and mommy war comment threads, but it is amazing to have a network of supportive moms at your fingertips. As for the mommy wars I have yet to encounter anything terrible. In fact it has been quite the opposite - yes a lot of moms I know have very different opinions and parenting styles but overall it seems to be more of a sisterhood than a war. If there aren't any online groups/forums specific to your area, You can also try searching for national groups. I recently joined Moms of Multiples Resale on facebook which will definitely come in handy once the boys are here. If you have any questions or need help getting plugged in leave a comment below and I'd be happy to offer support.
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